Tag Archives: Talk
Talking with your child about his ADHD isn’t always easy. But it’s important to do, and it goes better if you keep it productive and positive.
“I have two children with ADHD, so I can speak from experience here,” says Terry Dickson, MD, director of the Behavioral Medicine Clinic of NW Michigan, and an ADHD coach. “The reason why you need to talk about your child’s ADHD with him directly is because you want them to be involved, to understand, and to be on board.”
These eight tips will help you talk about it.
When you find out your child has ADHD, that’s the time to start communicating with them about it.
“It’s never too early to start talking with your child about his ADHD,” says Patricia Collins, PhD, director of the Psychoeducational Clinic at North Carolina State University.
You’ll talk about it many times as your child grows and develops. Start having those talks as early as possible.
A good approach is to help your child understand what ADHD means, what it doesn’t mean, and how to be successful at school and in life. What you say should be appropriate for their age.
“You need to help your child feel special, and like he is part of the plan,” Dickinson says. “He should feel like he is involved.”
1. DO make sure your child feels loved and accepted.
Help him understand that ADHD has nothing to do with his intelligence or his ability, and it’s not a flaw, Dickson says.
2. DO pick the discussion time wisely.
“It should be a time when you are unlikely to be interrupted,” Collins says.
Try to pick a time when your child isn’t eager to do something else, like playing outside or before dinner or bed.
Leave some time for follow-up, so you’re available to the child after the conversation is over if he has extra questions.
3. DO let them know they’re not alone.
Many other people have ADHD, too, and everyone with ADHD can be successful.
Give your child examples of people who have or had ADHD that they might know, like Walt Disney, Michael Phelps, and designer Tommy Hilfiger.
Let your child know they are special and they can succeed as well as anyone else.
4. DO learn more about ADHD.
Talk to your doctor, reach out to advocacy groups, and find support groups in your area.
“One of the best things you can do is talk to other parents who already have experience with ADHD about what they’ve learned,” Collins says.
5. DON’T focus on the negative.
“Focus on their strengths, what they do well, and praise their accomplishments,” Dickinson says.
“Whether its sports, arts, or dance, they can pursue their interests and do well with your support.”
6. DON’T let your kids use their ADHD as an excuse.
“Kids can’t take the easy way out by blaming their setbacks on their ADHD,” Collins says.
“Parents need to help their child understand that ADHD is not a reason to not turn in homework, to not try their hardest, or to give up.”
7. DON’T expect instant interest.
Don’t be surprised if your child doesn’t respond immediately or seems uninterested, Collins says.
It takes some children, particularly younger ones, some time for new information to make sense, or for them to know what questions to ask.
8. DO maintain open communication.
“One conversation is just the beginning,” Dickinson says.
“Keep the dialogue going, talk about school, their friends, homework, extracurricular activities, and keep a positive attitude.”
Honestly, I don’t enjoy it when 1UP podcasts change to new names but it’s happened many times before. Remember 1UP Yours? That eventually became Listen UP, which then turned into 4 Guys 1UP, and then In This Thread after that. Sheesh, what’s in a name? Well, a lot really. And as much as I’ve enjoyed the role of host for Games, Dammit!, it’s not a name that reflects what the show is about today. Of course, we’ll always end up talking about video games, but we need a name that leaves a little more room for flexibility. We want to talk about games, but we also want to talk about culture, books, movies, interviews, developers, and real stories from people working in the industry. This past year we’ve recorded shows about Metal Gear’s 25th Anniversary, storytelling in video games, and even discussed one of the biggest cultural phenomena in Japan, Neon Genesis Evangelion.
Honestly, I don’t enjoy it when 1UP podcasts change to new names but it’s happened many times before. Remember 1UP Yours? That eventually became Listen UP, which then turned into 4 Guys 1UP, and then In This Thread after that. Sheesh, what’s in a name? Well, a lot really. And as much as I’ve enjoyed the role of host for Games, Dammit!, it’s not a name that reflects what the show is about today. Of course, we’ll always end up talking about video games, but we need a name that leaves a little more room for flexibility.
We want to talk about games, but we also want to talk about culture, books, movies, interviews, developers, and real stories from people working in the industry. This past year we’ve recorded shows about Metal Gear’s 25th Anniversary, storytelling in video games, and even discussed one of the biggest cultural phenomena in Japan, Neon Genesis Evangelion.
Justin Bieber followers voice their opinions on the heartthrob’s alleged run-in with marijuana.
NYT > Marijuana and Medical Marijuana
Dec. 14, 2012 — As the nation grieves over the horror of the school shooting in Connecticut, parents across the U.S. — both in Newtown, Conn., and elsewhere — are struggling with how to help their children through this tragedy.
WebMD talked to Leslie Garrard, PsyD, a child psychologist at Miami Children’s Hospital, and Melissa Brymer, PhD, director of terrorism and disaster programs at the UCLA-Duke National Center for Child Traumatic Stress. We asked for their best suggestions on what parents and others can do now to help children cope.
Q: What reactions should parents and other caregivers in Newtown expect from the children who have gone through this tragedy?
A: Kids can have a wide range of reactions, Garrard says. “Any exposure to trauma can have immediate reactions and lasting effects. Parents need to be very [mindful] and watch their children.”
“Some kids withdraw, some are dismissive, although internally they are scared. Some cry and some are outwardly terrified. Some become depressed. Some just kind of shut down. Some might have nightmares and re-experience the traumatic events. … They may be fearful of leaving their parents.”
Q: What reactions are typical from children who didn’t go through it, but watched news coverage or heard details about the tragedy?
They can also have [the same range of] reactions — maybe not as strong, but they can also be impacted, Garrard says. “When watching it and seeing it on TV, it’s very scary.”
The American Academy of Pediatrics President Thomas McInerny, MD, says in a statement that if possible, “young children should not be exposed to the extensive media coverage of the event — in other words, turn off the TV, computer, and other media devices.”
Q: Is this age — elementary school — a particularly difficult one to experience trauma?
A: Yes, according to Garrard, because it affects emotional development and the way we view the world — whether it’s safe or not. But “I think kids are very resilient. They can learn to maneuver the world and get through and past things. However, they do need a lot of care to get through things.”
Q: What is the best thing parents can do now?
A: The most important thing parents can do is talk to their children, Garrard says. “Sit down with your child. Tell them a really bad thing has happened. Maybe they have already heard it on the news. Tell them, ‘We need to talk about this.’”
See how they feel about it, Garrard says. You want them to share their feelings.
“Technology makes things a lot more complex,” Brymer says. “They are getting information through Twitter feeds and Facebook. It’s harder to keep up with what your kids are hearing. When we tweet, we hear something from someone and then you re-tweet. You can’t fact-check when you tweet or post something on Facebook.”
FRIDAY Sept. 7, 2012 — When people talk about their fears — even their terror of spiders — it can ease their anxiety, a new study suggests.
Researchers from the University of California, Los Angeles found that using negative words to label emotions during times of stress does not intensify fear, as some might think.
“When spider-phobics say, ‘I’m terrified of that nasty spider,’ they’re not learning something new; that’s exactly what they were feeling, but now instead of just feeling it, they’re saying it,” study co-author Matthew Lieberman, a professor of psychology and of psychiatry and biobehavioral sciences, said in a university news release.
The brain region that is involved in “stating how we are feeling seems to mute our emotional responses, at least under certain circumstances,” he said.
The study was published online Sept. 4 in the journal Psychological Science.
Study senior author Michelle Craske, a professor of psychology, said their approach differs from typical procedures that aim to have people think differently about the experience in order to reduce their anxiety. “Here, there was no attempt to change their experience, just to state what they were experiencing,” she said.
In conducting the study, the researchers asked 88 people with a fear of spiders to walk toward a tarantula in an open container outdoors. If they were able to get close enough, the participants were also told to try touching the spider.
The participants were then brought inside, positioned near another enclosed tarantula, and divided into groups. One group was asked to describe their feelings about the tarantula and their reaction to the spider.
In the second group, participants were told to downplay their fears and describe the spider in a way that made it seem less threatening.
“This is the usual approach for helping individuals to confront the things they fear,” said Craske.
The other subjects were either told to talk about something that had nothing to do with the spider, or not to speak at all.
A week later, the researchers repeated the tarantula activity. The study found that the people who accurately described their feelings were able to get significantly closer to the spider this time. Also, their hands were much less sweaty than those in the other groups, suggesting they were less afraid.
“They got closer and they were less emotionally aroused. The differences were significant,” said Craske. “With a fuller treatment, the effects may be even larger.”
The researchers noted the more negative words the participants in the first group used, the less afraid they were. They explained that by talking about their feelings, the participants eased their fear response.
The researchers said they are exploring how this approach might help people traumatized by rape, war or domestic violence.
Lieberman said, “I’m a believer that this approach can have real benefits for people.”
The U.S. National Library of Medicine has more about phobias.
Posted: September 2012